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#TheMartiniEffect (#HashtagNovella for #NYCBars Edition: Chapter 16)

The Martini Effect – Chapter 16 (The Bathroom Karamazov) Chapter 16.1 (16.1) (We rejoin our Dharma Drunk heroes roving the streets somewhere between Brooklyn and Queens.) We slip into a random bar on a random street from a random corner just needing a random bathroom. Marylou heads to the ladies’ room and I walk into … Continue reading

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#MutantMonologue No. 2 - #WeirdInstagram Edition ("Louis, the Leeches, and the Lord") (2.) So, I go home, kneel at the side of my bed, as I ask the Lord, "Why you make us so smart and so dumb at the same time?  And why you give a leech 32 little brains?  And why are we sometimes smarter than a leech - like we go to the moon and invent the wheel and Papa Orville's old carburetor - and sometimes we dumber than a leech - like we kill off what feeds us. And the Lord gets back to me. "Louis," the Lord say, "a leech is only ever going to be a leech.  But I had to give your kind the dignity of choice." "Dignity of choice?" I ask the Lord. "Yes, Louis." So I say back to the Lord, "Lord, I'm not the brightest crayon in the box, but I need to be asking why a leech can only be a leech and our kind needs to have the dignity of choice?" And the Lord gets back to me again, "That's the only way I could figure out how to make this whole thing work." So I ask the Lord, "Why is that the only way you could make this whole thing work?" And the Lord gets back to me, "I can't tell you the reason for that, Louis." And I ask the Lord, "Why not, Lord?" And the Lord gets back to me, "Because the whole thing won't work if I tell you anymore." So I say to the Lord, "Okay, Lord.  Thanks for listening." And the Lord gets back to me, "No problem, Louis." So, I go back to Papa Orville and I tell him, "A leech has 32 brains, but we got dignity of choice." And Papa Orville asks, "Who told you that?" I tell Papa Orville, "The Lord told me that." And Papa Orville say, "Well...He should know better than us." And He should.  Because He's above Papa Orville's pay rate. (2/2)
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